Spoilers as sexual dysfunction

As I’ve been growing increasingly fond of The Wire, I’ve been reading more about it from a cultural and creative point of view. This is perilous as a lot of the material out there talks about season four, which I’m just getting to after ending season three with a non-stop four episode awesomefest. I make note of the things I come across and save them for future reading. For when I’m done with season four.

One of these things of note is this series of QAs with The Wire creator David Simon and some music guy. I briefly perused a couple of them trying not to come across spoiler material when I saw Simon’s commentary about leaked DVD screeners on the internet. It’s hard to read tone, but from the looks of it he doesn’t seem overly upset about it because, in effect, it helped provide buzz for the show. He was, however, mighty distressed about spoilers.

I’m most disappointed in the viewers with bootlegged copies who have consistently posted spoilers on websites and impaired the viewing experience of others. I find that to be selfish and not a little bit infantile — the sort of behavior that denotes someone who is unable to, say, sustain a sexual act for more than a few seconds, thereby proving themselves a huge disappointment to any and all partners. Yeah, I’d definitely say that any asshole, who, armed with a bootleg copy of a show, posts a clip of a major character being killed on YouTube or headlines a website posting with “XXname hereXX R.I.P.” has pretty much defined himself before the world as a hopeless, useless premature ejaculator.

There you have it. People that post spoilers are useless premature ejaculators, like those that posted this Battlestar Galactica Season 3 blooper reel. SPLOILERS.

Though, to be honest, I kind of lost interest in BSG after “Exodus.” Or, more to the point, pretty much right after I started watching The Wire. I only have room for one TV show at a time in my life and right now, I’m committed.

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